Unexpected Arrows

Life.

Life is in constant state of change. That's one of the things you can most rely on. Change. And change is going to make you...to make me uncomfortable. We must become uncomfortable to change- to grow. Some change we know is coming. This is the change we are probably most ok with. Because we know that it's coming, we prepare for it, we come to terms with it in our minds. We often times even welcome it! Finally getting through puberty, for example. Welcomed with wide open arms flailing like a mad man that just reached the finish line of his marathon. Other change, the unexpected kind - the kick-you-in-your-gut-and-now-you're-bleeding-internally kind - that isn't so welcome, yet it comes all the same. For me, most recently, that has been healing and dealing with the death of my two babies. This has been like a EF5 that ripped through my life so suddenly and then my husband and I were left to pick up all the pieces of our life that had been wizard of ozzed all over. And toto we definitely are NOT in kansas. This change has been extraordinarily difficult, with painful arrows being shot at me at all times. A memory trigger could happen at any given time. Like just now, for example.

There I was, just minding my own beezwax, going through my day getting ready to walk out the door to go hand out my business cards to local businesses when lo and behold I get an e-mail. Not just any e-mail. An e-mail I THOUGHT I had successfully unsubscribed from because of its content. It was an e-mail from Enfamil. Fortunately my phone previews my e-mails for me and gives me just enough information to know what the e-mail is about! It was about how my first baby was almost 6 months old and how his or her nutrition needs were evolving. 6 months....is that right?! wow, yeah, that's about right. 6 months. I immediately envisioned my living room full of toys and a big fat baby girl crawling across the floor. 6 months.

FOOMP 

arrow. straight to the heart.

Life is so strange. One day you can be going along just fine. Healing. Getting better. Feeling good and excited about the future. And just like that a memory arrow can shoot right through you and make you crumble like the last piece of jenga.

So what's the point? The point is change is inevitable. Pain and being uncomfortable is guaranteed. And it is ok to not be ok. It's just not ok to stay there. We MUST continue to change. We must grow. We must, eventually, pick up all the pieces of the jenga puzzle. The point is there is hope. Marvelous hope. Hope that will whisk your breath away and leave you speechless and longing for more. Hope that will be a beacon of light in your life. Hope that will reach down and gently help you along. Hope that will sustain.

Because you WILL be ok.